By Martha Stark
"Martha Stark's primer on resistance is a special ebook. It takes because the center of the scientific challenge the patient's reluctance to alter, that ubiquitous and paradoxical phenomenon of our paintings within which humans come to us soliciting for assist in altering, after which do their point top to maintain switch from happening...
This is a piece that is right away a pragmatic consultant and a theoretical travel de strength. Readers who trip during this slender quantity with Dr. Stark will go back from their travels to their perform a lot trained, having encountered new rules and previous ones in new types, greater in a position to face the typical travails of psychotherapy."
–David E. Scharff, M.D.
"Every so usually a publication emerges from the giant sea of analytic writings that startles in its creativity and usability. A Primer on operating with Resistance is simply one of these publication.
Dr. Stark is as transparent as a bell. She manages advanced theoretical suggestions with sophistication and nice sensitivity for the fabric. for instance, the differences she makes among convergent and divergent clash, or among phantasm and distortion, are stylish. The query and solution layout of the publication is comforting for the newbie, and a pride for the more matured reader as well."
–Anne Alonso, Ph.D., Harvard scientific institution
A Jason Aronson Book
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Extra info for A Primer on Working with Resistance
It breaks his heart when he discovers that the therapist is not as good as he had hoped the therapist would be. That the therapist is not as good as the patient would have wanted him to be is what I am here referring to as a nontoxic reality- and the patient's need is to deny this truth about his therapist, to deny his disenchantment. On some level, the patient also needs to believe that the therapist will turn out to be as bad as the parent actually was. It makes him anxious to discover that the therapist is not as bad as he had assumed the therapist would be- assumptions based upon negative experiences he, the patient, had early on in relation to the toxic parent.
In what follows, we will be addressing ourselves primarily to the convergent conflict that exists between two forces in direct opposition to each other, the one a defense against the other. More 8 A PRIMER ON WORKING WITH RESISTANCE specifically, we will be concerned with the patient's experience of the tension within him between the two forces in opposition. It will be this internal tension that will eventually provide the impetus for overcoming the patient's resistance. HOW IS CONVERGENT CONFLICT EXPERIENCED BY THE PATIENT?
The patient who faults, blames, and accuses is not accepting the reality of things as they are. Nor is the patient who protests that it isn't fair, that he is entitled to more. Nor is the patient who insists that his objects change, demands that his objects be other than who they are. Such patients are not accepting reality; they are refusing to accept it. They are not confronting reality and doing what they must do to come to terms with it; instead, they are refusing to confront reality, they are refusing to grieve.